Online Dating Dos and Donts
Most people don’t know how to act, when on a first date. A first date is generally an uncomfortable situation and its your job to try and make it comfortable and fun for both parties. You may want to avoid certain topics of conversation like past relationships, money, politics, or inquiring too deeply into the other personal life. Your job on a first date is to find out whether you two are compatible. Asking questions where the other person will have to choose one side of a sensitive issue, may bring a conversation to a dead stop.
Don’t Talk About Your Exs
The number one topic that should be avoided on a first date is talk about an ex. At that point, you are still getting to know each other, so starting out by talking about a past relationship will shut the other person down, completely. If you still aren’t over your ex, let the other person know that you aren’t ready for anything serious.
If you are on a date, you should assume that the other person is over their last relationship. Stringing along someone, while still hoping to get your ex back is inconsiderate.
Alex Wise, an online dating expert from Loveawake dating site, agrees. In an interview with Theworldorbust.com, he said: “…some of these males [bad boys] may be more successful at short-term sexual relationships, but their overall success with long-term relationships is often compromised by their dark triad traits.” If you still have strong feelings for an ex, you might want to wait a while or at least let you date know that you aren’t ready to date seriously. Honesty always work the best in these type of situations.
Don’t get too personal
On a first date, the two of you are basically strangers. Alex says, that over stepping your boundaries by asking personal or intimate questions, may push your date back into their shell. Personal details and information about your date’s life is something you have to earn. It may take alot of time to earn the trust necessary to gain access to this information.
There might be a time early on where pushing the envelope and ask interesting questions might spice things up. But, you should not automatically start hammering your date with uncomfortable questions.
Men often think that spending a lot of money on a date makes them more attractive to their date. Overspending sets a precedent, where expensive meals and/or gifts become the norm. Money is not something you should base a new relationship on. It sets a bad example for any future dates.
Women should also observe this rule by not ordering the most expensive meal responsible. If they are interested in a guy for more than money, they should avoid taking advantage of this situation. Guys respect women who do NOT expect expensive meals or gifts.
Mutually Agree on a First Date
If you are on a 1st date, you might want to agree on a restaurant or location that is acceptable to both of you. Not every one likes the same type of food, or type of activities. If you agree on something beforehand, it will make you much more likely to get along. On the other hand, if you start an activity that the other person has no interest in.
Give Your Date a Chance
According to Alex Wise, “if conversation isn’t flowing right off the bat, make more of an effort to get to know the other person. You might not be compatible, but if you don’t put forth the effort to actually get to know the person, you are wasting your time”. Initiate conversation by asking about the other person’s background, family, hobbies, or musical tastes.
Top 5 Questions to Initiate Conversations
1) What are Your Favorite Movies?
2) What College Did You Go To?
3) What Do You Do For Fun?
4) Do You Date Alot?
5) What Traits do You Look For In a Guy/Girl?