Ingredients: organic dark chocolate, organic wild blueberries, organic lavender.

You can really taste the lavender! And the blueberries/dark chocolate combo is yum. Very tasty. Not top-notch chocolate, but decent.

Tastes decent. No carbs.

YOU WILL NEED:

a container to eat from
a utensil to eat with
hot water
instant mashed potato flakes
one can of Nalley Noodles & Chicken (In A Hearty Broth – not the weird shit with peas, and not the Noodles & Turkey, either because it’s nasty.)
margarine (optional)
milk (optional)
salt (to taste)

—

put a little bit of hot water at the bottom of your eating container (a bowl, eg.,)—not too much, because you don’t want to overload on potato, and you’re going to be adding the sauce from the noodles and chicken, later. I like to add a big plop of margarine to the hot water. Make sure it’s really hot, because that will eliminate the need to cook the noodles. Add flakes, a dash of milk if you like, and some salt, if needed.

There should be a lump of fairly dry mashed potato product at the bottom of your bowl. If it’s too wet, you aren’t going to be able to properly eat this dish, and it will turn into a kind of stew, instead.

Open can of Nalley Noodles & Chicken.

Dump noodles onto mashed potatoes.

Stir, and eat.

Nummy!

This is just vanilla and chocolate, yo. Boring.

This is a good low-end lipgloss; available in drugstores and big box stores all over the country. It’s the best wand-applicated lipgloss I’ve ever tried. Not sticky at all, goes on smooth, has a nice shine, and available in a variety of subtle colors.

Here’s a tip for choosing the right color for you – match the color of your product to the color of your aureola, or for more drama, the darker color of your nipple. I like #35-Chic.

All the incestuous homoerotic subtext you can handle! <3

Forget all your fancy pansyass coffee—this is the real stuff. Manly soldiers drank this in the harsh wintry forests of the Ardennes, before kicking some Nazi butt! What else could you ask from your morning beverage? I ask you.

Besides, this stuff is so lightweight, you can hump it anywhere. All you need is water!

Also, I am too cheap to buy a coffeemaker. This stuff is a bit of mid-twentieth-century heaven. Keeps forever, too, not like wussy coffeebeans that lose “flavor,” and “freshness.”