All Consuming : paperstars

A story about "First Among Sequals"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Sun, 21 Sep 2008 01:37:52 GMT

First Among Sequals

by Jasper Fforde

This one took me for-ev-er to get through.

Surprisingly, it picked up speed toward the middle and had a relatively satisfying and fun ending.

A story about "The X Files: I Want to Believe"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 22:11:51 GMT

The X Files: I Want to Believe

by Chris Carter

As a die hard X-Phile I HAD to see the movie no matter how bad it was, that’s what I told everyone, and I reasoned that no matter how terrible, at least I’d see Mulder and Scully again, that had to be worth a few points, right? So I showed up at my local theater for the very first showing on the very first day… and left in a sulky rage. It was like a very long boring episode that I wouldn’t have paid much attention to on tv (okay, can we all admit that there have been some REALLY boring episodes of our favorite show? This would have been the single worst episode and it was extra long). There were few redeeming qualities to the movie, all of which were too short, too little, and for most of them, far too late in the movie. I’ve actually recommended everyone wait til the DVD to come out—even to my crazy X-Phile friends who were of the same mindset I was, the “I HAVE to see it in the theater, I just HAVE to… it’s THE X-FILES, I HAVE TO!” mindset. To them I said, “Wait for the DVD… and even then maybe don’t even bother.”

I WANTED to like this movie. I wanted it to be great, and my expectations weren’t even very high to start with. But it was lazily written with none of the scariness, none of the wit, none of the dark mood, none of the unexpected and weird the X-Files used to pony up. I wish they hadn’t made this movie at all, it’s like a belated, undeserved black mark on the record of one of the greatest tv shows of all time.

A story about "Nothing Burns in Hell"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 03:22:39 GMT

Nothing Burns in Hell

by Philip Jose Farmer

This was a very strange book. It calls itself “A Really violent, sometimes funny novel” ... but I’d say it was a sorta violent, less-than-sometimes funny novel. It also was more of a mystery than I expected, particularly because I did not find it in the mystery section of my library which is where I think I’d have put it after reading it. For the most part I could have done without this novel.

A story about "The Little Lady Agency"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Sun, 06 Jul 2008 20:35:26 GMT

The Little Lady Agency

by Hester Browne

This was SURPRISINGLY good for so-called “chick lit.” Much smarter than a number of books I’ve read and very reminiscent of Bridget Jones. The end was a little weak is pretty much my only complaint.

A story about "Rush Hour 3"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 07:52:09 GMT

Rush Hour 3

I love Jackie Chan movies (guilty pleasure). I greatly enjoyed the first two Rush Hour movies. So it’s not surprising that I really liked this one. It was hilarious and had lots of fun action sequences. The downside is that it seemed EXTREMELY short, though it was supposedly 90 minutes, it felt even shorter ~~- I felt like they needed another 10 minutes or so just to complete the story arc and build to a real climax -~~ almost every battle had the same amount of tension so when the end fight scene came I didn’t know it was the end! I thought it was the “one just before the boss fight” you know? Where it’s pretty bad but then the MC has to face his personal demons and succeed where he’d previously failed. I felt like that was missing and so the movie seemed rushed, especially compared to either Shanghai Knight/Noon movie. But as a fun, funny action comedy, as a Jackie Chan movie, I’ll let it go.

Very funny and as always, the bloopers are half the fun. If it’s not your scene, this won’t convert you, but it’s a 90 minute escape for the Jackie Chan believers out there. ;)

A story about "Stardust (Widescreen Edition)"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 07:44:41 GMT

Stardust (Widescreen Edition)

What’s really odd is that people say they liked the last half of the movie, but the last half of the movie was the part that was almost nothing like the book. They added and changed SO much to make it more Hollywood formulaic fun and effects and characters (the lightning ship captain’s “traits”, the giant battle scene at the end). I’m not necessarily complaining, but the movie should perhaps have chosen to be either quirky and surprising and charmingly funny like the book or just fun, humor, and effects like (most of) the movie, not half of one and half of the other. Part of the fun of the book was figuring it all out (and the charming curse which was not even in the movie at all!) but the movie just laid it all out there without question—or if there was a question it was only for the stupidest of viewers (without giving anything away).

I was just disappointed. I did greatly enjoy it, and I think if maybe there was more of the second half type humor and scenes and in-your-face blockbuster fantasy I’d probably enjoy it more, as well as if they’d stayed closer to the book and mellowed it out. Either way. It just didn’t meld together very well for me.

A story about "The Bridesmaid Chronicles: First Dance (Bridesmaid Chronicles)"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 07:29:53 GMT

The Bridesmaid Chronicles: First Dance (Bridesmaid Chronicles)

by Karen Kendall

Got sucked in by the cute graphics and the fact that I was going to be a bridesmaid at the time I picked it up.

I admired the way the author let you design the male main character’s looks (pretty much) based on the hint of a couple of hot celebrities to use as templates. I bet most women just picked one or the other and imagined the actor the whole time. Very crafty. We may do that unconsciously or even by decision, but in this case we were encouraged by the author. After all, the real movie stars are hotter than our imaginations (cause our imaginations make them TOO perfect maybe? Or I just have a crappy imagination, fine, whatever lol)

Pretty boring though and false… What I assume to be a typical romance (don’t read romance in general). I thought that the representation of the guy’s mentality and thoughts to be laughable! If guys want to know what women think men think like (they fantasize), read this book.

A story about "Jemima J: A Novel About Ugly Ducklings and Swans"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 07:23:05 GMT

Jemima J: A Novel About Ugly Ducklings and Swans

by Jane Green

Finished this in just one sitting - not that I couldn’t put it down, but the pace was very fast and the prose was light and easy to read. It was a pleasant way to pass a lazy Sunday evening. It was just very easy to read until it was done. Though the constructions of the omniscient narrative are sometimes very bizarre, using “we” as in “I wish we could tell you that Ben Williams is standing but ten feet away” and in addition to slipping between first person and 3rd omniscient (with the reader included as the mysterious “we”) it also slips between present and past tenses which was the most jarring for me - the present was used for setting the scene which just seemed lazy more than anything. The back of the book said that it has a ”...surprise ending no reader will see coming.” But unless the only readers that are supposed to read this book have never ever seen a romance movie… or better yet have no frontal lobe, you pretty much get the first conclusion that springs to mind.

As with most chick lit I’ve read I have a problem with the moralization that the ending gives us—what lesson did the protagonist really learn anyway? As in most of the books I’ve read she didn’t really learn her lesson (she learned A lesson maybe, one the author clearly thinks is the right one, but as a reader I’m left thinking that the protagonist is still confused and just as flawed as at the beginning) but she received her happy ending anyway. Puts me greatly in mind of the Shopaholic book I read.

People with eating disorders lots of times may wrongly believe that their entire life will suddenly and miraculously be alright and perfect if they could only lose the right amount of weight and be the right size. The truly strange thing is that in this protagonist’s case, she was absolutely RIGHT!!!

Nothing more than mindless fluff… at least it was kinda fun to read though.

A story about "Blade of Tyshalle"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Mon, 27 Aug 2007 01:13:36 GMT

Blade of Tyshalle

by Matthew Woodring Stover

This is a sequel and because I read the first book SO long ago, I found myself a little bit more confused about some things than I think I normally am in a sequel. I appreciate that the author didn’t spend forever rehashing the first book because when authors do that it is very annoying, but a few more clues about who this or that person was would have been nice. This author is big into not explaining things to you, but rather giving you little clues about everything (from the structure of the world to who a character is to what the hell is going on) and letting you put it all together. Which was overall very nice because I didn’t feel insulted or bored by a lengthy exposition.

I’m not sure if I liked the first one more or not. I think in some ways this one was better and in others the first one was better.

A story about "Confessions of a Shopaholic"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 06:49:25 GMT

Confessions of a Shopaholic

by Sophie Kinsella

The story was pretty much a failure. The heroine reminded me of Bridget Jones, but only in the way that a wax statue reminds you of a real celebrity.

What I did like about the book is that there is some reality to the psychology of the character’s thoughts. Anyone who has ever experienced an addiction to something will identify with the spiraling behavior of the heroine. However, her turning point is lame and late, coming AFTER a major success rather than at her lowest point; her revelation is weak and uninspired and false. Instead of punishment for her ever increasing lies and the way she abuses everyone around her, she is unjustly rewarded without repentance or even once realizing all of the harm that she’s done to other people because of her obsession with shopping, money, and appearance. Her realization is a purely pragmatic one regarding her own habits regarding bills. Call me nitpicky, but I’d like a little bit more character growth than that!

I tried to feel good about myself in comparison to Rebecca’s vices and flaws (which isn’t a hard thing with this character! too many characters are too GOOD, you know?), but even that is a hollow victory: someone who is SO out of it, SO self-absorbed, SO superficial, SO bumbling, SO incompetent, and SO cruel to other people still gets the predictable fame, fortune, and rich-good-looking-guy in the end, while the rest of us are cheated out of a fraction of her happy ending.

A story about "A Simple Plan"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 06:36:39 GMT

A Simple Plan

by Scott Smith

A literally chilling tale.

I’m at a loss as to what else I can write without giving the details of this thriller away and also what words would explain the horror and the grief this book stirred in me.

Have you ever done something you never in the past thought you could have done?

A story about "Something Rotten (Thursday Next Novels)"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Wed, 27 Jun 2007 08:13:29 GMT

Something Rotten (Thursday Next Novels)

by Jasper Fforde

This one was just about as good as the first one! Huzzah!

A story about "Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Mon, 28 May 2007 08:12:54 GMT

Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch

by Neil Gaiman

The first half of the book had me writhing around with laughter. Then it went a little south… but still an overall great read with a lot of oomph behind it. A sweet story that might challenge your perceptions and what you take for granted.

A story about "Sex and the city"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Thu, 17 May 2007 02:12:04 GMT

Sex and the city

by Candace Bushnell

This book confused me a little bit. From what I’ve heard from others who’ve read it, they too had mistaken impressions about what the book would be like. Most people assume it will be a fluffy fun book about romances, dating, sex, etc, with some fabulous single women living it up and having hijinks… or whatever.

It’s actually quite a depressing and at times incredibly insightful collection of mini essays (articles, I guess is the story behind them) that paint a dark, disturbing picture about what it’s really like UNDERNEATH the parties, the drugs, the booze, the sex, the shoes, and the money. The weird thing is that I can’t tell if the startlingly jumpy “narrative” and the piecyness of it all is intentional or if it was an idiot savant like miracle. While a lot of it does nothing for me, there are parts where the effect is surprising and PROFOUND. It might be because who this books is about is SO far removed from me (younger and do not live in New York or even a big city) so I don’t really connect with it, but it might be because there isn’t much to connect with on a deeper level, I don’t know.

In short, not at all what I thought I was going to be reading, but probably better for it. I don’t know. Most people will probably be disappointed by the overall gritty, seedy, “real?” portrayal, and the fact that it’s not one cohesive story. Really it seems like the only thing the series has in common with this book is that some of the characters and settings are the same or similar.

Oh and there are NO BAD PUNS IN THIS BOOK. THANK HEAVEN.

A story about "Every Boy's Got One"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Thu, 17 May 2007 02:01:49 GMT

Every Boy's Got One

by Meg Cabot

It was poorly written and unbelievable. And I don’t mean the plot or characters (which were unbelievable, but hey, this is a fluffy romance or whatever right? I was willing to let that slide… to a point), I really mean the writing. The book is in the form of journal pages, PDA entries, and emails back and forth. But a lot of times what is being recorded doesn’t make sense. Like supposedly the MC writes in her journal things that happen AS THEY HAPPEN including conversations, with people in the book going “Hey, quit writing in that journal! Are you recording this conversation?” etc. It’s distracting because she can’t possibly be ruminating, writing, speaking, and playing cards or eating all at the same time like we’re supposed to believe.

It seemed really sloppy and lazy in terms of getting exposition in, too. At times characters wrote letters with things like “Hey did you blah blah blah?...Oh wait, I guess you told me that da da da da da, right? Hm, I guess I forgot.” or “Blah blah blah, oh wait, nevermind. I wasn’t supposed to say that.” You’d freaking delete that from your email, right!? This isn’t speech! But a lot of the correspondence was forced into sounding speech-like in that way that was distracting.

Finally, the love interest in the story was magically transformed SO unbelievably that I can’t forgive it. Come on, it’s not like Bridget Jones is THAT high of a bar to reach, but this book really makes it seem like it’s way up there (and it’s not like the men in Bridget Jones were even perfectly believable either!)

A story about "The Well of Lost Plots: A Thursday Next Novel"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Mon, 14 May 2007 06:38:48 GMT

The Well of Lost Plots: A Thursday Next Novel

by Jasper Fforde

Very good! Fun, intriguing, and just as good as the last two. The action may have been slightly more subdued… but that’s barely worth mentioning. Every book introduces more and more interesting and bizarre facets of the world—I wonder what could possibly come next.

I have to admit though… I hate hate hate hate HATE Miss Havisham. She was what made parts of the previous book unbearable.

A story about "Stardust"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Wed, 02 May 2007 02:38:22 GMT

Stardust

by Neil Gaiman

It was good and definitely worth consuming… but not as good as everyone hyped it up to be.

A story about "Lucifer's Hammer"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Tue, 20 Mar 2007 01:58:41 GMT

Lucifer's Hammer

by Jerry Pournelle

I would say that it is scifi because of the authors, the setting, and the content. The heart of the book is something more like classic, dark literature that always ends up being portrayed best in speculative scifi. The tagline on the back of the book reads “The lucky ones went first.” After reading the book, I agree. This “end of the world” novel is nothing like the more fun “The Stand,” and bears almost no resemblance to “Deep Impact” or “Armaggedon,” blockbusters about a similar event.

It’s a book that’s totally and completely worth reading, but also one where I almost wish I hadn’t read it because it will haunt my thoughts for a long while to come.

A story about "Abhorsen (The Abhorsen Trilogy)"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Wed, 17 Jan 2007 21:34:51 GMT

Abhorsen (The Abhorsen Trilogy)

by Garth Nix

For once a book had an ending that I thought really delivered on the promises it made earlier on. The beginning and middle were rocky, especially compared to the first two books in the trilogy, but it was pretty good, especially for a book that is for kids (or at least teens). I appreciated the fact that Nix wasn’t explicit in detailing the “happily ever after” aspect of all the characters’ lives, and thought it was plainly obvious what would happen to them all, but I didn’t need to read it to feel satisfied. I think to have written any more than he had would have been to insult our intelligence.

The characters were very “middle school” or maybe early high school, but that’s who the audience is so I’m sure they appeal more to that crowd—the characters are whiny, self-involved and irrational, but still likable.

A story about "Lady in the Water"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Wed, 17 Jan 2007 21:27:18 GMT

Lady in the Water

I hated this. I felt like M. Night was hitting me over the head with the message of this film, and also with smug superiority. I’m not one who just hates all of his work without care, I actually liked some of them, nor am I someone who is always on about how predictable they are or are not. This time though, it was way too predictable and I think the story lost some of what it was trying to do by being so blowfully unoriginal that I could guess it all the first time I saw every character. The message itself was massacred because of the awful storyline.

The one plus of the entire movie was that I liked the characters. Some of the more minor characters were extremely likeable, and Paul Giamatti was almost heart-breaking.

That said, I’m so sorry I wasted my time on this movie. I can’t help but feel like maybe it could have been done better, that it wasn’t a complete waste, but I can’t think of what would have helped… except to somehow alter the tone—it should have been more playful and less seriously SMUG.

A story about "Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby"

nobody@allconsuming.net (paperstars) — Wed, 17 Jan 2007 21:18:02 GMT

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby

Almost all of the movie was pointless and stupid. But the small, VERY SMALL, portion of the movie that was funny and clever didn’t make me regret watching it. It’s classic Will Ferrell… well maybe even a little bit more stupid than that, so if you don’t like really stupid humor, then pass.