All Consuming : Melissa Maples

Mmmm, strawberry.... (rated 5 stars)

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Thu, 08 Mar 2007 16:12:37 GMT

by Algida / Walls

This flavour is new from Algida, and I love it. Strawberry ice cream with strawberry sauce and little chocolate hearts. Fantastic.

I wouldn't call it a waste of time, but... (rated 2 stars)

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Mon, 05 Mar 2007 10:27:42 GMT

Babel

by Alejandro González Iñárritu

I normally love this sort of fartsy pretentious woe-is-our-society crap, but this one, I don’t know. Maybe too many obvious stereotypes? Self-righteous rich whiteys, Arabs opening fire on everything they see, young Japanese slut girls, Mexicans in trouble with border patrol… it’s all there. Maybe the point was that it was supposed to be offensive, or maybe I just got bored ofter Crash. Perhaps I should try watching an Adam Sandler film instead.

Hmmm.... (rated 3 stars)

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Wed, 21 Feb 2007 11:28:03 GMT

Frailty (Ws)

I don’t think the twists in this film are as clever as they think they are, but nonetheless I wouldn’t say this film was a waste of time. It had its moments.

Wow

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Thu, 15 Feb 2007 15:17:44 GMT

Session 9

by Brad Anderson (II)

This film… god, I don’t even know what to say. I don’t want to spoil anything.

Well, don’t watch it if you’re in the mood for a romantic comedy, let’s just say that.

Cute more than scary (rated 3 stars)

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Sat, 10 Feb 2007 06:00:23 GMT

Chinese Ghost Story

by Siu-Tung Ching

This is a strange one, but any film that takes place in a temple is good for me. And any film where there are sacrilicious goings-on in a temple is twice as good for me. And any film where there are stop-animation sacrilicious goings-on… well, you get the picture.

The subtitles on the version I saw were a little bit wonky in places, but I live in Turkey so I’m used to deciphering Engrish.

Why I recommend "Milka Strawberry Yoghurt"

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Sat, 03 Feb 2007 11:50:15 GMT

Milka Strawberry Yoghurt

by Kraft

I recommend it because Milka strawberry yogurt is just about the best store-bought chocolate there is. Yum.

Yum! (rated 5 stars)

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Sat, 03 Feb 2007 11:39:51 GMT

Milka Caramel

by Kraft

I didn’t think it was possible to like another Milka bar as much as I love the strawberry yogurt one, but… this comes very, very close, if not equal.

A story about "Malibu Coconut Rum"

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Sat, 03 Feb 2007 09:22:00 GMT

Malibu Coconut Rum

by Pernod Ricard

I used to be a Malibu-and-pineapple kind of girl, until my friend Louise said, no no no, it’s Malibu and milk, my dear.

I’ve been a Malibu-and-milk convert ever since.

A story about "I ♥ Lacta φράουλα"

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Sat, 03 Feb 2007 09:16:39 GMT

I ♥ Lacta φράουλα

by Kraft

I buy two boxes of these every three months at the duty-free in Greece… and they’re awesome.

I'm on the fence (rated 3 stars)

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Sat, 03 Feb 2007 07:29:28 GMT

Children of Men

by Alfonso Cuarón

I don’t regret having watched this film at all, which I guess sounds like pretty weak praise, but I’m still not having any strong feelings about it either way. I’m not sure if tense moments and chase scenes make up for lazy acting and sub-par storytelling. Nonetheless, I was entertained, and if that had been the only alleged point of the film then I guess it would have gotten another star or so from me.

Beautiful in every sense

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Thu, 25 Jan 2007 11:26:08 GMT

Akira Kurosawa's Dreams (Sub)

by Akira Kurosawa

This film is not my favourite Kurosawa (be sure to watch Rhapsody In August), but it certainly fills the screen with beauty. My favourite dreams are the one about the tunnel and the last one, but they’re all amazing and emotionally wrenching. Definitely worth your time.

Not all that terrible (rated 3 stars)

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Fri, 19 Jan 2007 13:23:05 GMT

Phone

A lot of people appear to hate this film, but I thought it was okay. There were a couple of jumpy moments, and though the story was a bit derivative, I didn’t think it was half-bad as pop-thrillers go. It’s certainly not the best Korean thriller I’ve ever seen, but I wouldn’t say it’s a waste of time, either.

Lots of good techniques

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Sat, 13 Jan 2007 12:27:00 GMT

Teach Yourself Speed Reading

by Tina Konstant

I read this book just hoping to pick up some hints and tips about improving my reading. I was a slow reader due to poor concentration— this book covers that issue and many others ranging from eye exercises to utilising peripheral vision. Very useful.

Wow

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Thu, 11 Jan 2007 09:51:45 GMT

Audition (Uncut Special Edition)

by Takashi Miike

I watched this film without knowing anything about it beforehand… for the first half hour I thought it was going to turn out to be a romance drama. Boy, was I wrong. Holy god.

The film appears to be reasonably low-budget, and yet the effects are incredibly real and life-like. I was amazed.

Why I recommend "The World's Fastest Indian"

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Tue, 09 Jan 2007 10:15:35 GMT

The World's Fastest Indian

by Roger Donaldson

I recommend this because Anthony Hopkins is a superb actor and this performance is one of his finest.

One of my favourite things about reviews on this site is that when reading a review (either positive or negative), one can then look at the goals and aspirations of the person writing the review, and thus get a feel for what sort of personality does or does not like a certain type of film/book/whatever.

I mean, I’m not saying it’s completely ill-advised to trust the opinion of an adult whose recent achievements include pissing on furniture, pissing in clothing, or other variations on the willful incontinence theme, but… well, I’m just saying. Your mileage may vary. Perhaps some wouldn’t want to trust me with my sissy scarf making. It takes all kinds to make the world go around, I suppose.

But seriously, who needs films when you can be entertained right here?

Nonetheless, if you’ve got a couple of hours to kill I’d suggest you could do a lot worse than seeing this film. I enjoyed it.

It's about time

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Sun, 07 Jan 2007 11:53:19 GMT

The Metamorphosis

by Franz Kafka

Somehow I managed to avoid reading this in high school… so I read it today. It’s a quick read, but afterward requires a lot of reflection. Well worth the time it takes to get through it.

Nothing original to say... (rated 4 stars)

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Sat, 06 Jan 2007 14:46:01 GMT

Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World: A Novel (Vintage International)

by Haruki Murakami

I’m going to agree with many others here— this is not my favourite Murakami (I don’t swing so much with the sci-fi-esque theme), and I certainly wouldn’t recommend it as a starter book, but after having read many other Murakami novels first, Wonderland was a welcome addition to the collection. The story is surreal enough that I didn’t get bogged down in the sci-fi stuff, and the imagery is rich and deeply textured. I’m a Wind-Up fan myself, so I like my Murakami stories twisty and multi-layered. Wonderland delivers on both counts.

Why I recommend "Delicatessen"

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Sat, 06 Jan 2007 14:35:02 GMT

Delicatessen

This film is a dark gem of comedy. I love it.

May induce flashbacks (rated 4 stars)

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Thu, 04 Jan 2007 06:48:35 GMT

The Squid and the Whale (Special Edition)

by Noah Baumbach

I think this is one of those films that will separate viewers into two groups: those who had supremely dysfunctional upbringings and can relate, and those who grew up in Brady families and think this stuff doesn’t really happen and therefore aren’t able to get it.

Me, I’m pretty much the same age as Frank (i.e. I was 13 in 1986), and my parents had the opposite relationship to Joan and Bernard (my Dad was the slut and my mother was the bitter, grasping-at-desperation intellectual).

I found this film to be charming and even funny at times, but beneath all that I was disturbed beyond belief to be shown a mirror in such a clever way. I wasn’t as depraved as Frank, but I certainly see a lot of my fucked-up teenage behaviour in Walt.

Two lasting highlights of this film for me were the name choices (it couldn’t have been better than Joan, Bernard, Walt, and Frank), and of course the haunting image of the squid and the whale in the museum. I will definitely watch this film again at some point once I’ve had a chance to fully absorb the initial viewing.

Why it's taking me forever to finish consuming "Remembering the Kanji I: A Complete Course on How Not to Forget the Meaning and Writing of Japanese Characters Vol. 1 4th Edition"

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Thu, 21 Dec 2006 20:39:44 GMT

Remembering the Kanji I: A Complete Course on How Not to Forget the Meaning and Writing of Japanese Characters Vol. 1 4th Edition

by James W. Heisig

Started it today, in it for the long haul. I expect this to take a year or more.

A story about "Şirince red table wine"

nobody@allconsuming.net (Melissa Maples) — Wed, 20 Dec 2006 19:16:27 GMT

Şirince red table wine

by Virginia

This is a story of how I went to the market downstairs and spent three million (about two dollars) on a bottle of this wine, and was shocked to hell at how acceptable it was… so acceptable, in fact, that I felt obligated to drink the entire bottle.

Fin.