About twenty or thirty minutes into the movie, I almost had to shut it off.
I didn’t think that I could handle it.
Too many bad memories started to surface that took me so long to nearly forget.
But I am glad that I finished it.
And it made me glad that I am clean.
At the end, when Mariane was clutching the bag as if it were her long lost love, her only friend, her only hope for tomorrow… that was me one too many times.
It almost made me cry to think of how much I was like each characters in so many similar and different ways.
On a certain level that I might’ve created on my own during my downward spiral, the movie made me miss a few things.
Another reason why I almost had to stop watching it.
Having the only shoulder you feel comfortable enough to cry your heart out on call you a crackwhore is a rude fucking awakening.
I don’t know why the movie made me miss that.
I know that I won’t be watching it again because I don’t want any kind of influences like those.
I still liked it a lot though, regardless.
Two and a half months clean and counting…
talk about the long hard road out of hell.
I’m still in hell, but it’s more like limbo.
I guess.
This is a subject that I could spend forever talking about and sharing.
It helps.
: )