Clownboat a.k.a. Hell To The No — 5 years ago
I knew this was going to be a total clownboat, but I couldn’t possibly see how I’d be retching myself through the 90 hellish minutes that this excuse for vomit is. The film’s about the hottie (being Paris herself, executive producer in this film) and the nottie, a physically ugly girl who’s best friends with Paris. The main character, a completely unsympathetic drab, takes advice from his best friend – a loser John Belushi-lookalike who lives with his mom – and tries to be OK’ed by the nottie, which apparently is needed to get to Paris. This film is entirely guessable. Everything is shit in this film, especially the scenes where Paris is shown in slo-mo. Avoid or watch when wasted.