This may not be Deborah Tannen’s strongest work. It’s well written, but there are two chapters that seem to be professional academic articles stuck in there to give the book more bulk.
Still, I think this is required reading both for all women whose sense of self is dwarfed by MOM. Mothers of adult children should read this too. Both parties can learn alot. Often, a woman is not aware of the metacritical messages she gives to her family members. They are often much louder than what’s being literally communicated.
When this book first came out, my sister pressured me to buy and read it. As the eldest daughter, I have kept on annoying my younger sister with my Drama Queen act. It’s a love-hate thing between me and my mother. Tannen does give out some practical ideas to cool the fire. What’s praiseworthy is that she doesn’t lecture, just gently slips in the facts. Unfortunately I’m too proud and immature to be the one to take the first step.
Men should read this too. They may be of another gender, but this book gives deep insight into what are the passions that keep consuming their women.

This book had been calling out to me ever since it was first published. I waited for the price to go down, and bought it.

The first chapter or so, the book wasn’t calling out to me in its words. I’m hoping further chapters will do that.

Another issue: The book’s subject seems a little too close to home right now.

So I’ve put it down for now.