Great movie. That is all.

Lucky Number Slevin starts off splendidly and then careens into a ditch. A muddy ditch swollen with fetid water. By an abbatoir closed down by health inspectors due to infected manure.

The cinematography is superb - sumptuous settings, gorgeous colours, and good composition. Likewise the acting - the characters tower above the flimsy plot they are forced to inhabit. My complaint is about none of those.

What is set up as a smooth heist movie turns into anything but. Not only that, but it does so in such a contrived and Rube Goldberg way that it spits on the elegance of the initial set-up. Are you intrigued by Bruce Willis’ hints about the Kansas City Shuffle—“When everyone looks right, go left”? Prepare to be disappointed. It turns out to be just a bunch of pretty words Bruce Willis’ characters makes up on the spot and that play no part in the direction of forthcoming events.

There is, in fact, no heist. No con. No wily job. Just a huge WTF. But the getting there is pretty. Watch Thank You for Smoking instead. Or rent Ocean’s Eleven.

It’s rare these days that I go to see a film not knowing a fair bit about it, but I was a bit hazy on this one. Family outing (!), so picking something we’d all sit through narrowed the choice to this: and I’m so glad!

It was a great deal darker than I expected from the trailers. Twists and intrigue, dark quirky humour… I loved it! It all starts with a bad case of mistaken identity…

Josh Hartnett looks surprisingly devourable (although how does he keep that towel on?! Mine falls off when I’m drying my hair, and surely I have more to keep it up?!), and the rest of the cast is stellar: Sir Ben Kingley, Morgan Freeman, Bruce Willis, Lucy Liu – all excellent.

Definite thumbs up!