I’ve never really gotten into feminist theory and even in the field of music I have made a conscious effort to avoid my writing and research straying into this particular field. This is odd because as a performing and composing musician I’m all too aware of the huge gender inequalities within music and musicology. It’s not that I’m not interested in feminism within music but more that I’m perhaps a little afraid of compromising my reputation and status as a musician within the musical circles and societies I operate in by raising questions about whether I am treated differently, judged differently, viewed differently by my predominantly male contemporaries. I do not want to risk raising the questions that might highlight the “elephant in the room” (or elephant on the stage) that I use my femininity to my advantage on the stage and in my creative practice and yet, perhaps, the price I pay for that is that I do suffer prejudice, resentment and downright misogany by men and sometimes women who do not like to see a female performer who does not conform to the traditional “behaviours” such as modesty, passiveness, shyness and weakness.
I’d like to think that I further feminist issues in music by being a technically proficient and confident ragtime guitarist and singer, but I don’t think I’d want to risk my music by becoming more outspoken on the issue which is perhaps a sad reflection on just how far there is to go in the struggle for gender equality within music.