I can’t stop playing this. I count the hours until my work day ends so I can get online and lay the smack on total strangers on the internet. The online gameplay works exactly as it should – you mash some buttons, and 30 seconds later later you are racing against 6-12 others across the globe, some scarily good, others deploringly bad. Massive amounts of fun, indeed.

Hello, my name is Michiel, I am 34, and I am addicted to Mario Kart Wii, with all the sadness that implies.